SICSS-Howard/Mathematica Alumni Legacy Teaching Fellow Talks about Carrying the Light and Restorative Spaces
This blog is part of the 2022 series “The Future of Computational Social Science is Black” about SICSS-Howard/Mathematica, the first Summer Institute in Computational Social Science held at a Historically Black College or University. To learn more about SICSS-H/M’s inaugural start, read last year’s blog “Welcome SICSS-Howard/Mathematica 2021” or our first blog “Uncovering new keys to countering anti-Black racism and inequity using computational social science.” If you are interested in applying to participate in SICSS-H/M 2023, check out our website.
“We are the light, we are the culture.” This quote is a reminder from Rashun’s father to remember who WE are as Black people. It embodies the authenticity Rashun tries to carry with him into academic spaces to help counter the microaggressions and challenges he and so many of us face. He also carries the memory of the restorative experience he had at SICSS-H/M 2022, which he detailed in a previous blog.
Rashun was once again inspired to return to SICSS-Howard/Mathematica and took on a new position: SICSS-H/M Alumni Legacy Teaching Fellow in 2022. Naniette H. Coleman, founder and lead organizer of SICSS-Howard/Mathematica and PhD Candidate in the UC Berkeley’s Sociology Department caught up with Miles in October 2022 to discuss his experience returning as an alumni and the larger need for restorative spaces for Black students in every university.
Naniette: Please introduce yourself and tell us about your research.
Rashun: I am a doctoral student and recently a PhD candidate at the University of Mississippi’s social welfare program. I am really interested in compassion fatigue among nurses who treat clients with infectious diseases. My research looks at the ways in which treating clients with infectious diseases impacts people emotionally and physically.
Naniette: Last year you wrote about the restorative nature of your experience at SICSS-H/M. Can you talk about why these spaces are important?
Rashun: I study compassionate fatigue. I know the things that I need to do to be restored, whether it's sleeping better, going outside, going to museums, and such. Last year, I was in the deep South, and I found I needed more and SICSS-H/M was the added rest and the restoration that I needed.
I think we all have had a tough time. I had a very tough semester, things going on in the world, Covid-19, George Floyd…alongside all these critical moments and topics I kept finding myself in spaces where I was expected to be silent. I encountered a lot of anti-Blackness in and around Mississippi.
So in that toxicity and in that silencing, I found that SICSS-H/M was restorative for me, and I wanted more. So that's why I agreed to be an Alumni Legacy Teaching Fellow (TF), and I began thinking about ways to finish my doctoral program.
Given the way that I was trying to find community in Mississippi, which was through academic venues that require more work, often unpaid too, it wasn't restorative. While I was making connections, it required more work, whether it's on a committee or such, which isn’t always fun. And I can say with SICSS-H/M while it was work, there was a joy there. There was an option to continue on a project or not, so it's a little different than in the academic arena and joining committees and having to show up for meetings every week and give of yourself when you have little left to give.
Naniette: Can you now tell us a bit about your experience with SICSS-H/M to date, both in year one and year two?
Rashun: Year one was intense; it was a lot of pre-work. I would say I entered with some anxiety, reading the accolades and bios of other peers and what they have done as far as papers, leading up to minute one of logging onto Zoom and seeing the faces.
It was great having you, Naniette, as our leader and setting the tone and raising this level of engagement and willingness to be open and connect with other scholars. It made a difference.
Year two as a teaching fellow, you are seeing the students and the scholars and knowing they're having the same experience you had, seeing people come out of their anxiety - an anxiety you understand deeply - and coming alive, and asking questions. It was an interesting kind of experience to watch it all unfold, this time being a fly on the wall.
Naniette: Also, being privileged to what happens behind the scenes - can you talk a little bit about that? What did you do as a SICSS-H/M legacy alumni, TA? What were the things that you did that stood out in your interactions with students?
Rashun: I helped with the lunchtime talks for Cite Black Women and varyCSS and formulated questions about their work and helped facilitate that discussion.
Naniette: Were you there for the Kamala Harris Twitter activity?
Rashun: As a TF, I am popping into the Zoom rooms to check on the groups. I’m personally not R savvy, but I was just seeing how they were trying to figure out the R coding. Whether it's utilizing the office hours or other scholars or the Mathematica Teaching Assistants, asking questions like “how do you do things,” it was a really good opportunity to see them asking questions because sometimes we doctoral students suffer in silence, so having this space where doctoral students are saying, “I don't know how this works,” and then people stepping in and explaining how something works, or, “let me pop into the office hours to ask them” was really cool to see. You don't see that kind of vulnerability in many doctoral programs. SICSS-H/M is a valuable complement.
Naniette: Do you feel like it was because it was hosted by Howard? And you know we prioritize the voices of Black people. I also would love to hear if it helped your confidence to have done this exercise last year and to be in that space, even though in your words you're not a big R person. But did you see things that you were able to add?
Rashun: I wanted to add something to the discussion, and even though someone on the team was pretty good at R and there's excitement there, you want to be part of that excitement of figuring out the code. At the end of the day I don't know if it was helpful or not, but I knew it made me feel like I was contributing, and my colleagues didn't shut it down. They encouraged me. We were in a space where we were all encouraging and encouraged.
As far as having Black folks, having those collaborations and vulnerability…it’s something you don’t get too often, such as having other scholars of color figure something out on that level. It's a space that feels like it's okay to be vulnerable. It was good to have that space of stability and step away from the compassion fatigue I am normally exposed to.
Naniette: SICSS-H/M is a family. It's more than just the event and hearing your experience, I'm reminded of the fact that there are heavier expectations for service on Black academics so in order to find that community, you're having to give something, and SICSS makes a point to pour into you and ask nothing of you.
Rashun: I think that SICSS-H/M is in some ways really preparing us, me for discovering what our capacity is. What does it look like? Thinking through signing up for something and showing up, and thinking maybe this isn't the best fit or maybe I don't have time anymore, and how to navigate that space right and instead of like think sometimes, as you know, as a person of color or Black person, I know that I'm seen all the time.
But then there's times when I feel like I'm not seen, and sometimes disappear. It has been an option that has really negative consequences. Because it's read as a lot more than not showing up, not engaging, and so you get the opportunity to have those conversations with other people of color.
Naniette: There's a loving posture. We assume the best always. You’re allowed to drink from the firehose - you can say “I'll just take this piece and go with it,” or take none of it. The community, connection, and engagement support you to be the best version of you, academic or not, what you choose to be, is what we tried to build here and it's always a joy to spend time with you and hear your perspective. Is there anything else you want to share as we close?
Rashun: I mentioned this last year in my blog, one of my committee members who was on my comprehensive exam committee is Dr. Saijun Zhang, and he participated in SICSS so he told me about it in 2020. I think he might have participated in 2016 or 2017. It was the end of class and he was kind of like, “Oh, yeah, like check out this thing.” So had he not mentioned that I wouldn't have known, so I do want to give a shout-out to him for just mentioning it.
There's a bigger picture and connection I got here because of him as well. Sort of like when you know someone that has just gone through a PhD program–– you have an idea what they've gone through, but not entirely. With SICSS-H/M you have an idea of what they went through, so you get to gain many connections simply by participating at a site.
Naniette: So it sounds like I may see you again in 2023? What do you think?
Rashun: I wouldn't miss it. See you there.
For more information about SICSS-Howard/Mathematica, check out our website, follow us on Twitter, like us on Facebook, and join our email list. Apply now!
About the authors
Naniette H. Coleman is a PhD candidate in the Sociology Department at the University of California, Berkeley and a UC-National Lab In-Residence Graduate Fellow (Los Alamos National Lab). Her work sits at the intersection of the sociology of culture and organizations and focuses on cybersecurity, surveillance, and privacy in the US context. Specifically, Naniette’s research examines how organizations assess risk, make decisions, and respond to data breaches and organizational compliance with state, federal, and international privacy laws. Since 2016, Naniette has directed the AAC&U award-winning Interdisciplinary Research Group on Privacy/Coleman Research Lab at Berkeley. Naniette holds a Master of Public Administration with a specialization in Democracy, Politics, and Institutions from the Harvard Kennedy School of Government, and both an MA in Economics and a BA in Communication from the University at Buffalo, SUNY. A non-traditional student, Naniette’s prior professional experience includes local, state, and federal service, as well as work for two international organizations, and two universities.
Rashun Miles is a PhD candidate in the Department of Social Welfare at the University of Mississippi and an affiliate of the Ricardo Brennand Institute in Recife, Brazil. Rashun also has a Master of Education from Teachers College at Columbia University in Psychology and a Master of Social Work from the University of Michigan. His research focuses on museums, integrating urban complex systems and feminist pedagogy (ethics of care) to address compassion fatigue among helping professionals. Rashun served as an Alumni Legacy Teaching Fellow at SICSS-H/M 2022 and was a 2021 participant.